Reflections on Release Day

Hey everybody. My book came out today. I just wanted to write a few thoughts as I’ve now reached this point. First, a few things: Sorry about my lack of So Bad It’s Good Friday last week. There was some holiday going on or something like that. Either way, I was very pre-occupied with rum that day. And fireworks, I guess. But mostly rum. Then this weekend kind of just spiraled into a blur of sleep and Batman Arkham Knight and Fallout 3. But this Friday I’ll have another one, and it’ll be a movie this time.

Back to your regularly scheduled programming.

I feel like somebody with a special secret. Today, everybody is going around because it’s just another ordinary day. But to me, it’s an exciting one. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still flat out nervous that I’ll just be buried in the mountain of Kindle books and nobody will ever read it. I honestly don’t care about how much money I make from it. I care about readers. It would suck if I never got any. But it wouldn’t be the end of the world. As I’ve gotten here, I’ve thought: Wow, I actually did it. I wrote and finished a book. I put it up on the Amazon store and I got a few promotional posts with a review lined up. And I did this all while having a full-time job, moving, getting a degree, being diagnosed with depression, and functioning like a normal adult with bills, three dogs, and a husband.

I don’t say this because I think I’m special or my circumstances are any different than any other Indie or triple-A author. I only say this because, knowing me, this is a damn accomplishment. In a previous post I said that my mother told me lazy should be my middle name. That’s not some cute little insult that mothers come up with when they want to nag you. It’s true. I’m self-sufficient and I get stuff done, but I try to take as many shortcuts as possible. It’s why some of my end-of-year reviews usually have the criticism of me not doing things properly because I go too fast. I didn’t take any shortcuts with this, though. I stuck it out. I kept at it. And now I’m here.

It’s kind of beautiful actually.

In my About Me section, I mentioned that I wanted to be a writer to try and help support my family. When I started this journey, that was my full intention. I thought if I make some money, if I do something with this, then maybe they’ll be happy. But that’s not what happened. The project sort of evolved as I grew up and made a stake on my own. As the intentions changed, so did the actual story. As I flipped through it recently (after a long hiatus of not looking at it. If your unaware, the editing process makes you sick of reading your own work) I realized that I probably couldn’t write this same story now. Back then times were rough. Right now, I’m in a good place. It’s strange how coming-of-age works in real life.

So what’s next for me? Obviously, I’m still going to promote The Beast, and I’m going to do a bonus post this week featuring the most amazing drawings  you’ll ever see. I’m currently working on another book because I’m a masochist and a writer, and I kind of want to keep doing this thing. My new project is completely different from The Beast. But it still has monster’s in it. Funny story: I was actually going to call this blog The Monster’s Den, but at the time I was like, I don’t know if I’m going to write about monsters my whole life. And after this project, I have another story stewing in my head featuring — wait for it — more monsters! Le sigh. Maybe one day I’ll get sick of monsters. For now, I’m living with them.

Have a happy Tuesday, reader! I hope it’s splendiforous.


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